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Yesterday I came home feeling shittier as ever.

I went into the store room to grab a bag.

A bag that I knew and familiar with. A bag that I knew everytime i picked it up, its time for me to move on.

Then I went into my room, where suddenly a flash of you sleeping on my bed and i see myself on the computer. And then tears starts to fall like rain.

As i unfold the bag, i cant help to think tht this is all over now.

No doubt it was 6months ago, but i never did stop and move on.

I open my closet and there it was lying there are your clothes. One that Im familiar with is the one you always slept in it. And then i start to miss the many times you stayed over and we hug each other to sleep. Again my tears start to fall. The smell of it, reminds me of you, the softness of the shirt reminds me of your touch.

And then as I put your clothes in the bag, I wish that I didnt have to do that.

Bt i have too.

And then, there was the bears you gave me.

As I picked them up, I remmeber the promise you gave to me.

One bear for every ocassion we celebrated until Ive got all the collections of them.

And then as I open another closet, there it was, the dress that you bought for me to attend your best friend wedding.

That dress that I wore again on our last anniversary.

As I slowly fold the dress and placed it into the bag,

I couldnt help bt to cry even more and seeing tht it would be my last seeing the dress

And when I think about it, I knew this would be the last seeing you too.

While I was packing all those, I played our song repeatedly on the lappie.

I could remember the very first time we hear tht song together and we were dancing to it.

And I could remmeber the many times this song had played.

When the song played, it was you calling me.

And I remmeber the first word to every phone call you made was " Darling, what you doing?" or " Darling, cippy ah? cute cute ah?"

It was a sentence I wouldnt get to hear again.

And then I saw the box of earing that you gave me. One that you always will get for me until i have all of that collection.

 I then saw the ring we both had.

As I run to my fingers, i turn around it and saw your name engraved in it.

As I put all of those inside the bag.

I am missing you horribly.

I wish to have it all back.

And then as I close the bag, I knew its time once again to move on.

To built a solid concrete wall to protect my heart.

And never again give my all to anyone/

My love for you is real and forever will be,

If only you see that.

-S-